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Today is the first day of the rest of our lives, and it will never, never be this good again.
Current Month
May. 12th, 2006 @ 01:04 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
This is even worse than usual. A plug, and it’s not even timely.


by Beth Henley
Directed by Amy Attaway

May 11-12 @ 8 PM
May 13 @ 2 PM & 8 PM
Martin Experimental Theatre (MeX)
Kentucky Center for the Arts
$15/adults, $12/students
(502) 584-7777

FEATURING: Mike Brooks, Emmett Bowles, Tad Chitwood, Chris Guetig,
Leah Roberts, Laurene Scalf, Susan Shumate

Short synopsis: Chekhov takes Savannah in this wicked comedy of manners.

Longer synopsis?Collapse )

We got a great review by Charles Whaley of of last night’s sell-out opening!Collapse )

Come check it out. It’s a strongly written, obscenely well-done play, if I do say so myself.

And I do.
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May. 4th, 2006 @ 03:54 pm Kristmas in Kentucky
Current Mood: Gosh, I have to pee.
You outsiders may not know, but this Saturday will be the 132nd running of the Kentucky Derby. To you, it will likely be an odd, unengaging choice for afternoon sportscasting. To us, it is an orgy of abandon; a violent hurricane of civic pride and poor judgment. We wear enormous, flower-encrusted hats to conceal the fact that we have ejaculated our brains out the tops of our heads. Or, as Louisville native Hunter Thompson put it,

The Kentucky Derby is a decadent and depraved thing.

So, within that context you can understand that absolutely nothing is getting done in this town this week. Commerce has not so much ground to a halt, as has left early for a julep in its skybox. No phones ring. I have received one non-pornspam email this afternoon.

SO: I give you this delightful poem that I just found.

On Turning Ten by Billy CollinsCollapse )
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May. 2nd, 2006 @ 11:10 am Communique from the near-East.
I received a marvelous post-card today from a dear friend who is banging Spanish chicks studying abroad in Spain. The following anecdote was related.

A young lad was being transferred to the Colonel’s regiment. He had splendid references, so the Colonel welcomed the lad effusively.
“Glad to have you aboard. You’ll quite like it here.”
“Yes, defending Khyber Pass and fighting Sikhs . . .”
“No, no,” said the Colonel. “It’s not like that anymore. On Mondays we play polo. Do you play?”
“Sorry, no. I’m not a fan.”
“Well you’ll like Tuesdays. We all play bridge.”
“Well,” said the lad, “I reckon I don’t know how to play bridge.”
“Thursdays are quite splendid – wife-swapping and carry-on. You’ll like Thursdays.”
“Sir, I couldn’t take part in anything like that!”
“Why not? Are you some kind of homosexual or something?”
"No sir! Certainly not.”
“Oh. Well, I’m afraid you won’t enjoy Fridays much either.”

Ah, friends. I certainly don’t deserve them.
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Apr. 27th, 2006 @ 11:58 am Strange Days
Current Mood: confusedconfused
Who would have ever thought that I would look back fondly on Ari Fleischer?

"Good old Ari. He was a straight-shooter. Sure he was slinging shit, but somehow you trusted him to sling it straight."

What hath Scott McClellan wrought? That pint-sized bastard. That physio-intellectual pipsqueak. There are many public figures with whom I adamantly disagree, and occasionaly harbor anger towards, but McClellan? I would jump Scott McClellan on the street, and I would fight dirty. My father taught me very few 'lessons,' but one which will always be burned in my memory is that it only takes seven pounds of pressure to rip off an ear.

But, alas, as you must have known, the bastards won't have McClellan to kick around any more. Now we have the equally odious if slightly more charismatic Tony Snow. We're on a wait and see with this one.

What unleashes this bile and misplaced nostalgia? An insiders view on the WHPC briefings vs. the gaggle by Good Ol' Ari in this morning's post.

Next up, my baffling, heartfelt tribute to George Herbert Walker Bush.
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Apr. 26th, 2006 @ 01:09 pm Huh, what's this?
Current Mood: Who's for dog-stompin'?
Oh, yeah. I remember this thing, albeit vaguely. What is it even for?

Oh, that's right.

Woe, despair, agony on me. My name tags are my shame and my chains.
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Jan. 12th, 2006 @ 08:32 am So wassa problem?!??
Current Mood: validated
Current Music: Morning Edition
*hic* I do solemnly *hic* swear to up . . . *hic*</href>
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Jan. 10th, 2006 @ 05:37 pm Pluggers
Current Mood: nervousnervous
I'm on the run, but I directed WORK by Catherine Castellani, and it opens tonight as part of the below. Tickets are FREE.

4 by 4 in 4
Actors Theatre
Bingham Theatre
Downtown at Third & Main

Experience world premieres of quirky comedies and contemporary dramas by emerging playwrights from across the country, featuring young emerging artists.

Jan 10 & 12 at 8 pm
Night Parachute Battalion by Ruth Margraff
Tiny Baby by Eric R. Pfeffinger
WORK by Catherine Castellani
Hum of the Arctic by Sarah Hammond

Jan 11 & 13 at 8 pm
Three Guys and a Brenda by Adam Bock
Relatively Clean by Karen Hartman
The Match by Ryan Pavelchik
Practicing by Rinne Groff

Admission is Free. Tickets are required and are available at the Actors Theatre box office or by calling 584-1205.

Underwritten by the Actors Theatre Development Board
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Dec. 30th, 2005 @ 11:40 am Lame and lamer still.
Current Mood: It is to laugh.
I know it's been ages, but I couldn't help but share the following listing from the Preditors and Editors web site, which offers writers background on publishers/editors/agents. Read the first paragraph, and then start at the bottom and work your way back up.

M.W. MILLS, LITERARY AGENT (Melanie Mills): Strongly not recommended. a literary agency. "Effective April 19, 2003, I will no longer accept any unsolicited submissions from new authors. I will host 2 Writer's Conferences per year attended by various other agents and editors from publishing houses and I will only represent established, published authors."

4/10/04: Editor's note: Latest news indicates that she was re-arrested and now faces extradition to the US.

11/26/03: Editor's note: Ms. Elisabeth von Hullessem, aka Melanie Mills, plead guilty to charges of fraud in Canada. She was sentenced to time served and remains wanted in several US localities.

11/7/03: Editor's note: It appears that Ms. Mills, aka Elisabeth von Hullessem, is alive and currently in RCMP custody in Canada.

10/10/03: Editor's note: A lack of evidence appears to contradict the posting to our bulletin board. P&E does not believe at present that Ms. Mills is dead.

6/23/03: From a posting to our former bulletin board:

Last week, during her trip to Europe due to a death in the family, Melanie
Mills died in a fatal car accident.

Therefore, all submissions to publishers have been retracted, all events
cancelled, and all existing publishing contracts have been reverted over to
the individual authors. Any contracts between an author, or authors,
revert immediately back to said authors in order that they may find
representation elsewhere.

I'm very sorry. This has been, and still is, a very emotional time for her
entire family and friends.
Good luck to all of you,
Kat Baker
Assistant to Melanie Mills
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Nov. 16th, 2005 @ 04:13 pm MEMORANDUM
Current Mood: wheeeeezzzzze

TO: All Staff

FROM: Emoticripple

I am a Golden God. You may kiss the ring.


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Nov. 11th, 2005 @ 12:46 pm We're all for them there Fam'ly Valyoos
Current Mood: amusedamused
Me: I'm happy to tag along if you don't think your folks will mind.

NsnaG: Just talked to mom. Apparently, the last time you were over there you touched her inappropriately, so she doesn't think it's a good idea that we both come over tonight. She said if you just want to come over by yourself later, then that's okay.
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Nov. 3rd, 2005 @ 03:30 pm LYC
Current Mood: boredbored
Today's email traffic

Productivity Figures on the RiseCollapse )
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Nov. 3rd, 2005 @ 02:29 pm Mid-day Malaise
Current Mood: indifferentindifferent
I am holding a script and reading the script and I can’t concentrate on it. I am thinking only of the paper cut I don’t have on my left pinky that I could have with just a small flick of my right wrist. My paper cut on my left pinky may be my statue of David waiting in a block of marble. How can I deny the world my paper cut? I don’t want it, I don’t think, but does the world require it? It is not yet 2:30 pm. My paper cut is not there and is so real.
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Oct. 3rd, 2005 @ 11:00 am (no subject)
Current Mood: ashamed

It is really impossibly shameful that the first time I update in nearly a month, I can't give you something better than a cheap plug. Believe me, this hurts me more than it hurts you. It's just kind of tough when one has to actually work at work, as opposed to diddling. Anyway, here's the plug, I'll try to block out some time this weekend to give you beautiful boys and girls your due, and, um, I guess holla back or whatever. The show features myself, the lovely and talented Cara Hicks and Amy Attaway, and Necessary's Artistic Director, Tad Chitwood. If you can make it out it would be mahvelous to see you.


The Necessary Theatre presents


by Theresa Rebeck October 6 - 9 & 13 - 15

8 pm

Andrew is in love with Georgie. So is Edward. Lydia is in love with Andrew. So is Georgie (or so she thinks). No one is in love with Edward, except maybe himself. Everyone used to be in love with Lydia, until Georgie came along. But that's just the beginning of the play! Throw in a possible sexual harassment suit and things are bound to get interesting.

MeX Theatre at The Kentucky Center. Tickets are $15 ($10 for students!) and can be purchased at the Center or by calling 584-7777.

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Sep. 9th, 2005 @ 12:00 pm Louisville Volunteer Opportunity
Help prepare rooms for incoming Katrina refugeesCollapse )
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Aug. 26th, 2005 @ 10:42 am (no subject)
It's been over between Maureen Dowd and I for a good long while, but it's things like this that take me back to the good times, from her NYT article of Wednesday:

For political reasons, the president has a history of silence on America's war dead. But he finally mentioned them on Monday because it became politically useful to use them as a rationale for war - now that all the other rationales have gone up in smoke.

"We owe them something," he told veterans in Salt Lake City (even though his administration tried to shortchange the veterans agency by $1.5 billion). "We will finish the task that they gave their lives for."

What twisted logic: with no W.M.D., no link to 9/11 and no democracy, now we have to keep killing people and have our kids killed because so many of our kids have been killed already? Talk about a vicious circle: the killing keeps justifying itself.

Keep clawing your way back to legitimacy, Maureen. We'll be patient.
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Aug. 23rd, 2005 @ 01:33 pm Best. News. EVER.
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
From Rasmussen:

PA Senate 2006: Casey 52% Santorum 41%
Survey of 500 Likely Voters

July 20, 2005

Election 2006

Pennsylvania Senator

Rick Santorum (R) 41%
Bob Casey, Jr. (D) 52%
Other 4%


July 22, 2005--The latest Rasmussen Reports survey shows that Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum is living up to his reputation as the most vulnerable incumbent at this point in the 2006 election cycle. Santorum trails Democrat Bob Casey, Jr by eleven percentage points, 52% to 41%.

Casey is viewed favorably by 49% of the state’s likely voters while 27% have an unfavorable opinion. For Santorum, 44% say favorable and 43% unfavorable.

Casey earns 85% of the vote from self-identified liberal voters and 62% from moderates. Santorum currently attracts 66% of the conservative vote.

Typically, Republicans do better among married voters. However, at the moment, Santorum attracts 41% of married voters and 40% from those who are not married.

Among voters who Approve of the job President Bush is doing, just 70% say they will vote for Santorum. Early in Election 2004, several Republican candidates had relatively low levels of support from Bush voters. However, as Election Day approached, their support from Bush voters increased dramatically. This phenomenon helped elect Republicans in Oklahoma and Alaska. The President is significantly more popular in those states than he is in Pennsylvania.

In the Keystone State, the President’s Job Approval is at 46%, slightly below his national average. Fifty-three percent (53%) disapprove.

Seventy-eight percent (78%) of those who disapprove of Bush will vote for Casey.

Looking ahead to Election 2008, 46% of Pennsylvania voters say they will vote for the Democrat’s nominee while 40% plan on voting for the GOP candidate.

Just goes to show you, people don't like people who even talk about fucking dogs.
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Aug. 22nd, 2005 @ 05:13 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: lonelylonely
Are the internets broken? Where are you people?
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Aug. 22nd, 2005 @ 11:56 am Six Feet Under
Current Mood: floored
Gosh. That was really something.

*withers under inadequacy of expression*
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Aug. 20th, 2005 @ 10:04 am (no subject)
Current Mood: nervousnervous
For those of you in Louisville and the surrounding area, I will be restaging Gil Reyes' production of Psycho Beach Party tonight at 7:30 at the Connection in their great big drag theatre. Well, actually, I'm leaving to go restage it right now, but it goes up at 7:30. Whatever. It's only ten bucks cheap.

Oh, and, predictably, I think I've made a real dog's dinner of things with New Girl. Details to be withheld, as I don't really remember exactly how it happened.
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Aug. 18th, 2005 @ 02:36 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: hyperhyper
I've been entirely too busy to say or do anything, but I will offer this brief excerpt from this week's email traffic:

Actually, my anxiety is a rabid, bloodthirsty wolverine, soaked to the skin and hungry for my head-guts.

Thank you. That is all.
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Aug. 12th, 2005 @ 12:53 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: exhaustedexhausted
I am honored to have been tagged by mr_clarinet:

List five songs that you are currently digging - it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're not any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions and the five songs (with artist) in your blog. Then tag five people to see what they're listening to.

Every Moment - Rogue Wave
No Children - The Mountain Goats
Everyday - Yo La Tengo
Kicked it in the Sun - Built to Spill (all-time favorite, irreplaceable)
Love Love Love - The Mountain Goats


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Aug. 10th, 2005 @ 07:16 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: self-aggrandizing
Oh and while I lazily link, did I mention that our local rag printed a letter spun out of this post?

It's short, if you're interested.
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Aug. 9th, 2005 @ 11:41 am CATF part I
Current Mood: rushedrushed
Current Music: Bill Maher on Fresh Air
Right, so I suppose I really ought to get something down about CATF before I forget.

First off, this is one fucking long drive. Granted, it's not exactly cross-country, but it is more than long enough for my taste. Added to which, I apparently chose for my trip the very same weekend selected to rebuild the entire states of Kentucky and West Virginia. Thankfully, Maryland just got out of the shop, or we'd have been in real trouble. So, right, tons of delays, and in fact about a half-hour of dead-stoppage on I79, a strip of road that we ought to have been doing at 90. During the stoppage, we played a rousing game of 'Going on a Picnic,' which is where you take turns adding to a long list of things you would take on a picnic that no one would ever take on a picnic. You start with A and work yourself to Z, and if you forget what to take in your recitation, you lose. Here"s what we took.Collapse )

We made fairly good time, all things considered, but still cruised into our first show filthy and with fifteen minutes to spare. I'm so very glad that we didn't punt and check into the hotel, because we were scheduled to see the premiere production of Sheri Wilner's Father Joy, a really beautiful show that starts off as the intersection of a deeply disinteresting intergenerational love story and a quirky family comedy. Add a pinch of fantasy, though, a dash of discussion of the nature of art, permanence, and familial love, bake for 90 minutes and you've got a laugh-cry-love-fest on your hands. It was aided by terrific performances by Cathryn Swift and Jonathan Bustle who played the parents of Abigail, the completely unengaging 'main character.'

Dammit. This is taking entirely too long. I will return to this after work with Melinda Lopez' Sonia Flew.
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Aug. 9th, 2005 @ 11:06 am (no subject)
Current Mood: complacentcomplacent
Current Music: lousy State of Affairs on WFPL
I am a lazy son of a bitch today, as most days, and I know that I would have had to hit the ground in fifth gear at work today, so I thought real hard, ate a croissanwich, and didn't go. I'll make it in for four straight hours of meetings this afternoon, though.

So, glitterandbegay was glittering and being really gay last night, and when I pushed him into the pool, he pulled me in after him, so my cell is now fried. If I had your number previously, it is unlikely that I do any longer. If I never had it and you think perhaps I ought to, now's your chance. At your discretion, please email numbers to me at

Before I move on: I recognize that I started it, but he was wearing swimming trunks, damn his eyes!

While the experience thoroughly sucked (I lost my smokes, brah!), it did bring back an interesting memory from my childhood. When I was young, probably four or so, my parents, over my impassioned protestations that Godzilla was almost over, took me to a pool-party at the home of a friend of my father. At some point, I was pretty much the only one in the pool, with the other kids off go-carting, and the grown-ups sipping coffee or LITs, or whatever. I got a smidge cocky, slipped out of my floaties, and slipped out to the middle of the above-ground pool. I have a brief memory from the following couple of minutes of how lovely the sun is from an underwater perspective. Next thing I know, I'm coughing on the deck, trying to knock water out of my ears by pounding the opposite side of my head like a cartoon character.

My pa had saved me.

At that age, nothing has that great an impact on you, but I love the memory more every time it resurfaces (no pun intended.) Later in the afternoon, I was walking around in the front yard and passed by the family wagon. I looked in the passenger window, and saw the entire contents of my father's overstuffed wallet strewn all over the front seat drying and wrinkling.

Sometimes, when I think I'm turning into a good person, I remind myself that I would probably stop, take out my wallet, cell phone, check book, note book, cigarettes, lighter, and maybe even my hanky before jumping in to save a drowning child.

But then, I never liked kids.
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Aug. 6th, 2005 @ 12:11 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: groggygroggy
You know those long, long nights of fever dreams where you're not awake but cannot sleep, and you're not sure you would actually know, one way or the other, if you were fully conscious? That's the last few days for me. I am confused and possibly slightly brain-damaged.

mcbrennan, on the other hand, is still sharp as a tack.

It is my birthday. I am supposed to be at a kegger by now. My head's all empty and goofy, and I shall have to take the bus to find my car.

Any chance we could just reboot at 2000, and run this whole thing once more? I swear I'll get it right this time.
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Jul. 28th, 2005 @ 06:16 pm Road trippin like a mug.
Current Mood: excitedexcited
Current Music: New Girl - Suicide Machines
Okay, gang, I'm off. I leave in the morning to see how they run things out at the Contemporary American Theater Festival. I'm not sure that there's a great deal they can teach us, as our formats are a bit different, but it pays to bone up. I got my intern a job out there this summer, which makes me quite proud, as I've never before actually managed to get an intern a real job.

So, it's super-sweet: they are putting me up in a resort and comping me into all the shows, including a newish Sam Shepard and a Sheri Wilner premiere. I love it when people get the impression that I am even more important than I actually am, which is OMG SO FVKING IMPRTNANT!!!!!111!!! If I can just get work to reimburse me my gas, which I think they will, this will be the greatest trip ever.

That is, if I don't actually have strep and my neck rots out and my head falls off for lack of a neck. I'd really hate it if New Girl had to drive my car home. That makes me uncomfortable, and would probably make us both dead because - confidentially - it's not exactly in peak working condition just now.

Oh, and yeah: I can't wait to tell you all about her/All about my New Girl. She's so white collar.

I'll give a full, if redacted report upon my return. Be well, and, if you wouldn't mind, leave an anonymous comment as to whether my new layout is an eyesore. I'm not anxious to redo it, but neither do I want to leave it sit if it sucks as badly as I suspect it might.

EDIT: Oh, and thanks to volvita for helpful grammar tips. I knew there was something itchy about my last entry. See if you can spot it!
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Jul. 27th, 2005 @ 12:14 pm CREAM
Current Mood: sicksick
Golly. I'm tired and my throat hurts a bunch.

On the upside, free pizza day! Hooray!

But anyway, to represent:


I laid awake an did nothing but roll around and stress out about ridiculous catering bullshit for work starting at about 4:30 this morning. I don't usually come to work until 10, but I was here at 8:15 this morning because I figure, hey, I can be tired, awake, in pain, and stressed out here for free, or go over there and get paid for it and get to leave early.

Fucking dreaming about catering. This is no kind of life, people.
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Jul. 26th, 2005 @ 10:11 pm Energy Incompetence
Current Mood: infuriatedinfuriated
This is flat-out disgusting. Just when I thought I was, as The Onion reported some months ago, suffering from 'outrage fatigue,' along comes a little gem like this.

For five years they have kicked and screamed about getting anything and everything they want into this bill in the interest of reducing US foreign energy dependence, and now, as final passage of their precious, precious, fucking life-saving effort approaches:

The White House has not analyzed how the legislation would affect reliance on imports, spokeswoman Dana M. Perino said.

Bastards. Get the down-and-dirty here.
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Jul. 26th, 2005 @ 12:22 pm Feliz anniversario!
Current Mood: sicksick
Current Music: Clap Your Hands Say, 'Yeah'

That's right kiddos, it's the Still Life's first anniversary! We're celebrating with booze, no-bake cookies, and a new layout that may not make it through the afternoon. It's a star-studded affair, featuring such high-wattage luminaries as you, me, and, of course, the National Security Agency! Hot damn.

Here's to all the good times we've shared, the new friends we've made, and the half-truths we've told. Raise your glass to another year of morose, incoherent drunken ramblings the warmth of community spirit and good, clean fun!

So that we may never repeat the colossal fuck-ups minor mistakes that may or may not have occurred over the last year, let's look at what made Still Life: Season One such a cry-til-you-fall-down-laughing sort of place:

Remember the early days of my first demotion, and getting falling-down drunk? Helen, I think it was just you and I at that point, and maybe well_versed.

How about casting a significant other in a play, coupled with LJ growing pains? Ah, September, if only we'd gotten to know you better. Oh, wait, we did (featuring jade999 before she was jade999, that's how damn cool we are here.)

And who can forget October's death-defying brush with self-awareness, or the first appearance of my new boss!

And then, when all seemed lost, a moment of clarity.


It's a wonder we made it through the New Year reasonably intact.

February brought a dearth of original thought, but did offer the disclosure of two bits of early Emotilore, The Drawer that Dare Not Speak Its Name and The Phone Book of Fear and Trembling, classics not to be missed by any emotiholic.

Suddenly, thunderclouds began to form on the horizon with the ironically-named first appearance of Perfect Girl.

March brought the predictable spring bitching.

In April, the Perfect Girl saga ran its brief, debilitating course.

And yet, there were glimmers of light.

So, season 2, eh? What peril may yet befall our inept intrepid hero? No way of knowing! Stay tuned! To paraphrase - follow me down my twisting alleyways, find a few cul de sacs of your own. Glad to have you all, and thanks so much for joining us for this very special anniversary episode of the Still Life.

Party on, all.Collapse )
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Jul. 23rd, 2005 @ 10:50 am It is not yet a civil hour, and yet must I mow the lawn.
Current Mood: confusedconfused
I hate myself so, so much for loving this.

And how are you good people this balls-scorchingly hot July morning?

Wow, the above entry reminds me of the Viagra emails I get from people like Noggin T. McUnderhill and what-have-you. I squeeled with laughter the first time I got one that started out 'Have at you!'

Now? Well, the thrill, she is gone.
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